Boundaries

 Setting boundaries in a marriage is very important because having clear set defined limits lets each partner know what is expected of them and when.

Boundaries are essential in all aspects of life from birth till death.

If we did not have boundaries life as we know it would not be possible, people would do as they wish without any consequences.  Society can not work without boundaries.

So having boundaries in your marriage is just as essential.

There are two main types of a boundary in a marriage physical and emotional.

A boundary is a limit that a partner should not cross in the marriage, so they do not damage the relationship, and it is your responsibility not to cross this boundary.

Physical Boundaries:

• The amount of screen time you have each day such as on your tablet or phone.  Spending to much time on these can interfere with your housework or interaction with your husband.
• How much alcoholic drinks you can have on an evening out.  Overindulgence often leads to major problems as we lose our inhibitions when under the influence of alcohol.
• Overspending, not sticking to the household budget set by your husband can cause him all types of problems such as not having enough money to pay the bills her has planned to pay.
•  The way you dress, for example when you are not with your husband you should be dressed modestly and then change into clothing he likes when he comes home.  This deters any unwelcome attention from males.
• Making sure you are not alone with an opposite member of sex for long periods of time.  Spending long periods of time with a member of the opposite sex on your own can lead to confusing feelings, and that is not appropriate for a married person.
• Having set bedtimes or wake up times make sure you get the correct amount of sleep for you and that you have time to get through all the tasks you have to do each day.
• Having meals on the table at set times, your husband works hard, and it is not unreasonable to expect to have meals when he returns home hungry.
• Physical boundaries in the bedroom such as what is acceptable and what is not acceptable.
• Acceptable behaviour when with family and friends, conducting yourself in a manner to which your husband finds acceptable and stopping behaviour that he finds unacceptable.

Emotional Boundaries:

• Honesty – Always be truthful with your partner, if you do something wrong, admit it don’t live with a lie, it will only drive a wedge between you and remember liars have to have good memories, the truth always comes out in the end.
• Being Faithful – Never allow situations in your life that can lead to attraction to another person.  Always remember your wedding vows
• Control Your Emotions – When you are angry or hurt think before you act, don’t say the first hurtful thing that comes to your mind.   Take a step back think before you speak
• Sex – don’t use sex to hurt your partner, denying them so you can hurt them.
• Love – Don’t tell your partner you don’t love them because you know it will hurt them